Musings of a Church Planter - Lesson One

I spent the last four years praying about, learning about, and attempting to plant a church.  During this process I feared, hoped, laughed, cried, and experienced any other emotion someone can muster.  Unfortunately, the process ended with the closing of the church.

There are a lot of reasons why: poor execution of plans, not enough resources, not enough people, not enough leadership from me...oh the list could go on and on.  And after closing, the list continued to go on, and it would have continued to go on if a respected leader had not sat down to dinner with my wife and me and simply asked, "What are ten things you take away from this process?"

Hmmmm....that had me thinking.  Yes, plenty went wrong, but what went right?  What did I learn?  What can others learn?  So I created a list.

Over the next few weeks I am going to try to share the list of what I learned in hopes of encouraging current and future church planters, leaders, or anyone interested.  It is a very lonely process at times but you are never alone. God is always with you.  Charisma may ignite a church plant but only God can sustain it.

I guess what I am trying to say is that if you are going through the many emotions of church planting or leadership, you are not alone and you do not have to do it alone.

In fact, that is the first lesson I learned - have a good friend outside of your ministry that you can talk politics with, watch sports with, or do whatever with.  Not a peer or a confidant or a mentor.  A friend.

There are times that leaders need to step out of leadership roles and just be human.  I read one article that said a person will always struggle in church leadership if they cannot simply learn to be just a Christian and be satisfied.  If you always have to be the leader, you will become disappointed and find yourself struggling to separate yourself from your leadership role in order to enjoy a friend.

If you are married, you spouse is your best friend but even they need a break from you - the leader.  They want to spend time with you - the child of God, the person.

Friendships remind us to be us and not an image.  Images can be distorted and so can we if we lose ourselves in our roles.  Friends will remind us how to relate with others and how to more effectively see people as Christ sees us - broken but healing, hurt but mending, weak and yet strong.  Value friendship and you will learn how much God values you.

So do not do ministry alone but especially do not do life alone.  You will not regret having a good friend or two or three to hang out with from time to time.

Who are your closest friends?  How do you make time for them?  How often do you purposely set aside time to be with friends?

As a Christian leadership coach, I can coach you through these areas.  Let me know what you think.